The Epitome of Chic

Yes, those were my first thoughts when I first saw her - the epitome of chic. Dressed in a deep red and sporting sunshades, I thought she was the cutest thing I had ever seen. And yes, she was most definitely the first love affair I had ever had. A love affair my wife, to date, does not know about - so, in some ways this piece is a confessional.

Sometimes people have asked me why I delayed getting married to my wife for so long. Was it because I had a secret love affair? I always vehemently denied it. I denied it partly because it was not true and partly because, well, I had to. The politically correct thing to do in such situations is to always issue a denial. Ask the celebrities - they will tell you the same thing - deny, deny, deny...even if you are being asked about a person you are gonna marry next week in Las Vegas....deny! Even if this person you are being asked about is, at this very moment, hiding in the trunk of your Mercedes ML 320....deny! Even if this person, as we speak, is cooking you a hot vegetable lasagna in your newly refurbished kitchen.....deny!

Likewise, my answer to these so called well-wishers, was always the same. "...love affair? Are you crazy? Hahahah....!" Right, a denial. Did those well-wishers have a valid point though? You read this piece and you be the judge of it.

I was just 24 at that time. Naive, easily influenced by good looks. It was pretty much love at first sight. For a long time, I had searched high and low, near and far, hither and thither, under and yonder, but to no avail. This is what young guys dream of right from the time they are in high school. They dream of this day, they rehearse it, they try to plan how they would react and how they would pretend to be "oh so cool". And here I was - this was my day - I was staring at my dream in front of me....and I was staring right into her foggy eyes.

At that time, she was with somebody else and I had to engage in a prolonged period of courtship and negotiation before she was finally mine.

We have been through a lot together. Many fun times and some not so fun times.

The trip to Pittsburgh comes to mind. I decided kind of late that we would be going there. We started hurriedly at 11 AM. I have never known her to complain about anything and she duly obliged. It was a 5-6 hour drive from Cincinnati and we spent a lot of quality time together - just the two of us and of course plenty of cassettes of the latest music albums. We just soaked up the pleasure of each other's company, me in her control and she in mine. It was beautiful.

When my parents came to meet me in 1998, they got to meet her as well. My mom was pretty happy with my choice. My dad felt I could have waited and gone for a more glamorous choice. But he was happy too. She had passed the litmus test!

The best part about her is that she never makes unreasonable demands of me - shes such a good girl and very low maintenance. I know I can count on her - day in and day out. She's Asian. Not like her glamorous high maintenance American counterparts who give less and demand a lot. Oh yes, I have had some experience with those as well and those times were not pretty. No siree Bob.

I dont want to get too much into the details, but I know exactly how to handle her. When I am working her over, I can feel her body heat rising, much like the heat of magma which is latent inside a volcano. Oh yes, I am pretty skilled in knowing how exactly to push her buttons to make her purr. And purr she does, much like a well oiled piece of machinery.

Much like a 1996 Toyota Tercel would. Oh, did I mention....my Tercel is a red color.